Three months from leaving home, some people says that time went slower when you are away from where your heart belongs, i found it rather not the truth, maybe dilemmatic i suppose, for when we look back at all the things that had happened we'll feel: GOD! three months are like a flash! however, in the contrary, when i look forward is more like: holyshit! i still got 9 months to go before i can pay my HOME! a visit...
Anyway i never thought this is gonna be this hard to me. Hello? this is ME we are talking about! the invulnerable me who spend his entire childhood imagine that he is at somewhere else, and now that he IS at somewhere else and all he can caught in his mind is that old street back home. isn't this ironic? or is just that i failed to notice what did i really wanted?
Well, honestly the pay in here is awsome, also i'm not afraid to say that the money i am getting paid does ease some of my grief. but sometimes i question myself is there anything they can pay you for parting from all your beloved family and your cute friends? i guess not, and may time ease the other part of my grief to make it a whole.

Four days ago it was my 23rd birthday, and on the next day, because it was Saturday, and on Saturdays we'll always have this a kind of a gathering dinner, and i dicided to cheer myself up a little. So i taught some of my colleagues the old drinking games i used to play with my friends, such as two bees flying into the bush, people in riverlake, tiger stick and chicken...and all of a sudden, it looked like a hell of a party for me to indulge myself in, creating a illusion that all my friends were sitting right behind the table, joking, shouting, laughing, swallowing beer like there was nothing but water in the glass. Am i childish or am i childish? AHAH!~~~

Now that rainy season is in the coming, and people who knows me well will understand that i've always loved the rain, for i thouoght it brings a unspoken sadness to the earth along with every drop it created. How much do i wanted to listen to the sadness of heaven and earth, and how much do i wanted to recognize how negligible my sadness is.